Um, help me
out a little here.
I believe that all
human beings, by our very nature, are creative, and
I mean creative in the most profound sense of the
word. If you happen to take your cue from the Bible:
It says that each of us was created in His image,
in the image of the Creator Itself, who made of us
miniature gods—creators—of our own worlds.
That's what human beings are, that's what we do: We
create.
I’m listening.
Tell me more.
So, okay. By our very
nature, what we do is create—and I mean create
all the time, with every thought, every word,
every action. And what we’re creating all the
time is the landscape of our lives: our relationships,
our work, our environment, our play. The fact that
most of us are largely unconscious of it—sleepwalking,
if you will, through the creation—only means
that what we manifest will more often than not reflect
random, rather than focused, thought, feeling, and
action, and delude us into believing that we are victims
of circumstance rather than makers of circumstance.
How
can I know where I fall in that spectrum?
If you want to assess
the degree to which you're unconsciously creating
your life, then look around at that landscape and
take stock of what you've made there.
How
can I tell if I’m living in my big spirit or
not?
Just ask. Whenever
a circumstance arises that calls for a decision, ask
yourself, What would my big spirit do?™, and
see if that’s what you would’ve done if
you hadn’t asked.
So this is
life. Sometimes my eyes are opened, sometimes they’re
closed. What difference could a coach make?
That depends on how
serious you are about living the life you really want
to live. The incredibly cool thing is that you have
all the tools. All the knowledge, all the power, is
already within you, waiting to be acknowledged and
directed! A coach helps you to liberate what comes
naturally. I guarantee that the transformations that
arise from being intentional in your creating, rather
than unconscious in your creating, can be profound.
But
how, exactly?
I hate to talk about coaching—most coaches do—because
the only way to really get it is to be coached. (For
a complimentary trial session, e-mail
Marguerite here.) It’s different for everybody,
and part of the fun is making it up together as we
go along. But, in general, coaching is an action-oriented
collaboration, in which I am at your service in co-creating
a life vision, and a strategy for manifesting that
vision, that is unique to you.
Can you be
more specific?
You may want to explore
your life's purpose or "right placement"
in a career. Align your choices in the outer world
with your inner values. Finish unfinished business
with close associates and family members. Figure out
what "the next step" is. Or just have more
fun. You may have a dream to start an international
organization to advocate for human rights, as does
one of my clients, or find a way to break into radio,
as does another, or publish a nonfiction novel, as
does a third, or switch careers, as does a fourth.
The coaching process is designed to clear away from
your life, bit by bit, all the stuff you’ve
been tolerating that depletes your energy and disables
your big spirit—and then to create the life
you really want to live and that only you can
live.
Take one more
shot at it.
I’m here to
help you figure out who you really are and how to
get what you want based on who you really are.
Then I hold you accountable to your visions and dreams
and to the plans I help you devise to achieve them.
I’m like a personal trainer for your life. You
don’t depend on me so much as use me—as
a resource and a presence in your life.
But
what’s the real benefit?
We all have untapped resources, and when those resources
are tapped, our work becomes more authentic, our lives
take on a new meaning, and, in general, we feel a
sense of ownership and freedom of choice. We enjoy
our work and we enjoy our life, which is the whole
point. If you don’t want that, then stay right
there; don’t move.
So, give me
an example. Who’s a big spirit?
It can be a captain
of industry, but doesn’t have to be. A rock-and-roll
star, an actress, a teacher, a writer, a business
owner. A friend of mine who’s a plumber is a
very big spirit. So’s the woman who got me into
coaching, a marketing consultant and onetime life
coach, who uplifts every person she comes in contact
with. The electrician who coaches my son’s baseball
team has one, as does an old friend, a landscape architect,
who, the last time I checked, was bound for Cambodia
to help build an orphanage. Big spirit is a state
of mind and being that is characterized by innocence,
open-heartedness, self-awareness, courage, and the
capacity to act immediately on intuition.
Who
are your ideal clients?
Anyone who realizes
they’re capable of much more and wants some
alert company while they molt and then reinvent themselves.
They can be people who have achieved great success
in their lives and now want meaning; they want to
stand for something and leave a legacy. Leaders who
have discovered that the climb to the top has left
them isolated, unfulfilled, and out of balance, with
nobody to talk to. Entrepreneurs who need a sounding
board. Creatives who have lost connection to their
creative force. Basically, big spirits of all stripes
who have decided, the hell with it, I’m going
for it.
Specifically,
though.
As a newspaperwoman
and freelance magazine writer, I coached the subjects
of my articles; as an editor, I coached reporters;
as a college teacher, I coached my students. My clients
have come from most walks of life. Most recently,
they have included a poet, a newspaper columnist,
an Ivy League professor, a public relations executive,
a coach, a nurse, and a waiter.
What
am I going to get from you that I can’t already
get from my spouse, a family member, or close friend?
There’s a lot,
so I have to use bullets.
- I promise to offer perspective, insight, inspiration,
acceptance, compassion, patience, clarity, a trained
ear, complete honesty at all times, and just enough
tough love, when called for, to coax you out of
your comfort zone and keep you focused on your
path.
- I will ask a lot of questions—sometimes
seemingly dumb, sometimes seemingly deep—and
really listen to you.
- I will not judge you.
- I will keep things light.
- I will always point you toward self-awareness,
fulfillment, and balance.
- I will be your sounding board, helping you
to clarify your goals and to devise a customized
life process for achieving them, on your terms
and on your timetable.
Meanwhile, the idea
in the back of my mind, all the while that you’re
distracted with the crush of daily life, is how do
I bring out the best you? A you that you can’t
even conceive of, as you sit here right now reading
this. Imagine having someone in your life who knows
that you were born great, who believes in you and
expects you to be great, and who will do
whatever it takes to get you there. If you’ve
got someone like that in your life, then no, you don’t
need me.
What makes
you think you’re any good at this?
Let me have others
tell you. See testimonials.
Why
not a therapist or a consultant?
There are key differences
between therapy, consulting, and coaching, all of
which have merit depending on the practitioner, the
client, and the circumstances.
- Therapy: One difference is
that the coach is always asking for, and expecting,
action. Unlike in therapy, I will not delve very
deeply into your pain and your past so much as
help you devise strategies for moving purposefully
into your future. Coaching differs from therapy
in that coaching is not necessary in order for
the client to function; coaching is for well people
who want to excel and to live personally extraordinary
lives.
- Consulting: Most people spend
their lives figuring out what they want and how
to get it. As soon as they get what they think
they want, they go right into figuring out what
they think they want next. Consultants largely
focus on the what and the how,
which can be very useful in the business environment.
As a personal strategy, though, the unrelenting
what-how cycle can be debilitating and stressful.
- Coaching: Coaching focuses
mainly on who you are. Once a person’s
focus shifts from what I want and how
do I get it to who I am, clarity
emerges and stress dissipates. Consulting is content-oriented.
Therapy is past- and discussion-oriented. Coaching
is action- and process-oriented; it’s about
self-recognition and determining one’s purpose
in life. Once you know who you really are, then
what you want and how to get it tend to become
self-evident. I help you to decide what’s
really important to you, and then I provide the
structure to keep you focused on creating the
life you really want to live.